“pride

[prahyd]. Show IPA noun, verb, prid·ed, prid·ing.

–noun

1.

a high or inordinate opinion of one’s own dignity, importance, merit, or superiority, whether as cherished in the mind or as displayed in bearing, conduct, etc.
2.

the state or feeling of being proud.
3.

a becoming or dignified sense of what is due to oneself or one’s position or character; self-respect; self-esteem.”
I dont hide the fact that my little sister is my hero and those of you who know her whether it be in real life, twitter life or any other form knows already why i call her that.
On Sunday past my sister, her partner, best friend, my husband and our mother ran the Asics British 10k London Run to raise money for the charity Marie Curie. The modest amount of £500 was the goal number to be raised and what of that that was raised was to be doubled by a kind family friend of ours and his business partner. Thanks to the generosity of many people on Twitter the amount was 80% raised within 3 weeks of opening the first giving page with a special thanks to Vicky and Dan for the tireless hounding of celebrities and for their donations!
Amazingly thanks to the generosity online and the generosity of our friends and family who were hounded at family barbeques and parties and to the doubling my sister raised over £9000 come the day of the run! Since then people have continued to donate and the total today stands at £10,087 – one hell of an achievement.
A lot of you however dont know the full story of the time around the run and since.
My sister has terminal cancer, but you wouldnt think it to talk to her. I have never in my life met anyone who has a positivity level like her everything has a silver lining regardless to how bad things may be.
During a conversation with a friend who was expressing her concern over my sister partaking in such a challenge whilst not being in full health she simply replied “Whats the worst that will happen, it kills me?”. During the hardest time in her life she exuded selflessness from the early stage of terminal diagnosis and has no intention in not participating in this run regardless of her health at the time.
The day before the run Amber was suffering from exhaustion. The night before my mum and my sister in laws parents held a large surprise party for the two of them to celebrate their marriage for friends and family who cannot attend the official ceremony next month. Amber danced from the moment the music started till it finished on a euphoric high of having all their close friends and family all together in the one place some of them she hadnt seen since she became ill last year.
Come the Sunday (day of the rest) my sister was clearly still exhausted, having arrived to the race early she managed to find herself a spot on the ground amongst the crowd and napped before the race started. A lot of people in her life including those around her that day told her not to partake in the race for her own sake but there was no way she wasnt going to do this race! The whole way through my sisters illness she has pushed herself to prove people wrong, she is a fighter to the core.
During the race i took my baby son to meet a friend for brunch, i have to admit i didnt feel guilty that i wasnt out there walking or running the 10k i did however have a uneasy and nervous feeling.
To my surprise i got a call after only a few hours to say the the gang were on their final kilometer of the race – they were flying through it!
I was so proud watching the group of them cross the finishing line, each and every one of them did a fantastic job as for most it was their first event like this, a few hours of selflessness came to this epic conclusion and seeing the smile on my sisters face with her own pride at completing the challenge she set herself is a moment that is imbedded in my mind! Amber ran the 10k, to many it might not seem like a big deal and although the pace wasnt fast she still ran it! It was only 5 months ago when she was receiving treatment to help her walk again after a serious operation.
At this stage it was visibly obvious that Amber was completely done in so after a brief pits-stop for some food my husband gave her a piggy back back to their house so she could get some rest.
On Sunday my sister pushed herself to the max and we had no idea what was going to unfold over the next 48 hours.
Once home my sister went for a shower before getting into bed, during the shower her legs gave out causing her to fall and twist her body, it took her partner and i to get her out the bath and dressed and my husband to lift her into bed where she settled and began to manage the aches and pains.
Through Sunday night and into Monday she started to deteriorate and was in more and more pain, by late Monday the decision was made to take her into hospital. When the paramedics were moving Amber it was the first time in the whole period of her being ill that she showed some vulnerability, she couldnt hide the pain she was in and she screamed through pain.
We all thought we were going to loose her and she has since openly said she thought it was her ending but in typical form she has fought and pushed herself because she has more to give.
After an extensive amount of tests and x-rays we were told the extent of her injuries – 3 broken ribs, 6 stress fractures including one in her spine in a lower disc and 2 broken toes. On top of the fractures her white blood count was worryingly low if you dont know what this means then basically its your white blood cells that fight infection the lower the count the more prone you are to infection and you suffer side symptoms on top of this, as a cancer patient this is a very serious situation to be in.
Pride to me is watching my sister fight back from what looked to be a situation with a bad end not only once but twice, pride to me is watching her perform a selfless act to raise money for charity knowing that she would suffer greatly after it.
Thankfully today she has turned a corner and her white cell count is coming up and she is in less pain than previously – i am so proud of her!
Sadly the long term future isnt going to change for us but the world has her for a while longer and she has so much more to complete that will make us more proud of her and of herself. I will always be proud of my sister, not only for raising money, being positive but for never loosing the will to fight!
Pride is my sister.